Sunday, March 1, 2009

Technical Terms for Country Folk

Admit it -- we are all learning a new language -- computer-ease. The following terms now may have double meaning to you -- whether you are country or city folk. Have fun!

~~Log on: making a wood stove hotter.

~~Log off: don't add no more wood.

~~Monitor: keeping an eye on the wood stove.

~~Download: gettin' the farwood off the truck.

~~Mega Hertz: when yer not keerful getting the farwood.

~~Floppy disc: whatcha git from tryin' to carry too much farwood.

~~Ram: that thar thing what splits the farwood.

~~Hard drive: gettin' home in the winter time.

~~Prompt: whut the mail ain't in the winter time.

~~Windows: what to shut when it's cold outside.

~~Screen: what to shut when it's black fly season.

~~Byte: what dem flies do.

~~Chip: munchies fer the TV.

~~Micro Chip: whut's in the bottom of the munchie bag.

~~Modem: whacha did to the hay fields.

~~Dot Matrix: Old Dan Matrix's wife.

~~Lap Top: whar the kitty sleeps.

~~Keyboard: whar ya hang the keys.

~~Software: them plastic forks and knives.

~~Mouse: what eats the grain in the barn.

~~Mouse Pad: that hippie talk for the rat hole.

~~Main frame: holds up the barn roof.

~~Port: fancy folk wine.

~~Enter: northerner talk fer c'mon in y'all.

~~Random Access Memory: when ya cain't 'member what ya paid fer it.